May 10, 2024 By: Melissa Gray, LCSW

Fast forward many years, which is when I embraced the opportunity to meet, learn from, AND take this picture with the one and only, DR. ALBERT ELLIS! I was amazed by his entertaining, straight-forward and authoritative way of presenting and sharing his knowledge. He was a wise man, who has since passed, but has left his mark on the field of psychology with lessons that won’t ever be forgotten.

Curious what this wise man taught that forever changed the path of psychology? Of course you are!  Okay, here it is….

Dr. Albert Ellis was the creator of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), which is based on his one simple formula:

A+B=C

Yes, that’s it! Extremely simple, right? That’s why it is so genius! Now, let me explain, so you understand the profound impact this one simple formula had on the emerging Cognitive Behavioral Therapy world and why most therapists today are very much aware of this formula and use it often in their practices.

Simplified Version:

A= Activating Event/Experience

B= Beliefs about the event/experience

C= Consequences (emotions; actions/behaviors) of those Beliefs about the Activating event/experience

This initial explanation might have some of you already in an “aha” moment with eyes opening to a whole new world of exploring and addressing emotions, but for others, examples and explanations might help. So, the following will be a very basic crash course in REBT…

You might have heard the quote by famous Greek philosopher, Epictetus, “People are disturbed not by things, but by the views they take of them.” He was definitely onto something. Dr. Ellis elaborated on that statement by creating his REBT formula.

Example:

A-     Activating Event

A man isn’t hired for his dream work position.

B-     (Irrational) Beliefs about the Event:

“I really must be a worthless person.”

“They don’t want to hire me; therefore, no one could possibly want to hire me.”

“If I am not hired for this position, I can’t possibly be happy.”

“This is awful; Everything bad happens to me!”

“My career is doomed; there is no way I will ever have a position like this.”

C-     Consequences:

Depression

Rage

Hopelessness

By using this example, it is easy to recognize that one’s negative “irrational” beliefs contribute to negative undesired consequences. What now? Well, we add D and E of course!

D and E

D- Disputing Irrational Beliefs

E- New Effect

Continued Example:

D-    Disputing Irrational Beliefs

“Where’s the evidence that because I didn’t get this one job, I am now a worthless person or that no one will want to hire me?” 

“Is it really awful? Can I truly not tolerate this? This is not awful nor intolerable, and everything bad doesn’t always happen to me.”

“This does not take away all the work and educational successes I have achieved. This may be a bump, but it is not the end of my career.”

“This does not make me less of a person. My value has not suddenly disappeared. I am still a valuable person with many positive traits and strengths.”

“I may not be the one for this job at this time, but someone will hire me. By experiencing this interview process, I learned that …. and will rearrange my resume to better show my work experience and keep interviewing!”

“This is not the outcome I wanted; however, this situation is not intolerable.”

“This is one job that didn’t work out at this time, but there are countless others out there; I can try again, or maybe I will explore my options (like a career-change or this is the push I needed to start my own company) and end up with a better outcome.”

E-    New Effect

Disappointment

Hopeful

Satisfied

“I am satisfied to have gained more knowledge about this process and will add it to my ‘lessons learned.’  This is making me stronger and more empathetic. I have much to be grateful and thankful for, despite not being hired.”

“Not being hired at this time is disappointing and not what I was wanting; however, I have much to be happy about and will work through this and find the right job for me.”

Now, don’t we all feel better having learned this bit of REBT? It’s amazing how one’s thoughts, beliefs, views, self-talk, etc. are plainly holding the reins on our emotions and how one can work to correct irrational thinking!  Once learned, this method can be used to combat undesired emotions, such as anxiety.

Effectively using REBT methods doesn’t happen overnight, and often, it is necessary to receive guidance, feedback, and support during this process to recognize subconscious, automatic negative thinking patterns and self-talk statements that can wreak havoc on one’s emotions.  It is important to work with a knowledgeable and REBT experienced mental health practitioner to fully develop these REBT skills.  One who can identify and challenge negative self-talk statements and irrational beliefs while helping restructure these automatic and ingrained thinking patterns.  This technique of identifying, disputing, and restructuring, must be practiced until one can independently complete these tasks.

I have taught the REBT method for (dare I say decades?) many years during my sessions with clients in both individual and group settings and often send REBT educational materials with them to be read and practiced in-between sessions. Independently reading about REBT and using REBT worksheets helps clients increase their knowledge about and experience in using REBT. I work to empower clients by teaching skills, such as REBT, which can be used as needed to improve overall mental health.

So, when I relay how much a simple picture of me with The Amazing Ellis means “at least as much as a Swiftie’s pic with Ms. Swift herself”, I hope you understand and can at least somewhat appreciate my fondness for my pic!  And that, my friends, is why my 2001 photo with Dr. Ellis means so much to me.

Thank you, Dr. Albert Ellis, for your amazing REBT lessons and contributions to the world of psychology!

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